As an avid reader of TC and 9rules follower its pretty cool to see the dialog here. Mike was pretty upset to say the least.

1) I did not say control over your site – control over the situation. There’s a difference.
2) I did not say you “just” started listening, I said it’s great you’re listening during what most would consider a tough time.
3) People realize you’re a real person, they don’t get where you’re coming from because recently you’re flip-flopping all over the place. Of course it is quite possible for the casual reader to forget because there’s nothing about “you” on the about page, with the exception of that one sentence.

As far as the site is concerned, there are issues with it. No matter what term is placed in the search box only 5 results come up. Unless of course you meant that to happen.

Fanning the flames? I’m telling you my perception. You say one thing and you do something else and you expect “us” to realize your goals are clear? Your goals are clear to YOU but they definitely aren’t clear…otherwise all this drama wouldn’t have happened. Thousands of web sites launched new designs during CSS Reboot, site owners launch new designs everyday. Many of them are detested. Very rare to have a fallout like yours. That’s because the problem went deeper than design.

People are attacking Rachel on my site with as much hate as others direct at me. There’s no way to explain that based on your argument. People are fucked up, and you guys are stoking the flames.

And I don’t think I owe a different explanation to anyone than I’ve given. Don’t get me wrong – my point here is clear. Just because I am bummed that people are saying these things doesn’t make me ready to just hand control of the site over to them. I’m not that weak. Many people, including people I considered to be friends, have taken some ugly shots at me and are making lots of assumptions that are incorrect. And the comments are just plain ugly. I’m not looking for advice on how to “take control”. I’m staring at the ugly side of humanity and commenting on it, that’s all.

I also take offense at the notion that I’ve just begun listening. I’ve always listened. That’s why comments are on, and why I leave most of the hateful stuff there. I only remove comments that discuss killing or hurting me or my family, or comments that attack other people in a cruel way.

I know what it’s like to be criticized. When I joined 9rules I was caught up in something that started long before me. I was insulted, everything I said was ripped apart, but not even close to what Scrivs went through. So we get what you’re dealing with, seriously.

Let’s tell it like it is:

1) You don’t want to change the design, that’s why it’s staying (your choice).
2) The points you make here don’t come across on your site. Why is that?
3) Your designer shouldn’t have quit the way she did. Yes, I’m a woman saying I don’t agree with another woman. Sue me. It was unprofessional. IMO she should have spoken to you first. Do I think your entry was appropriate? No, but that does not justify her actions.

I don’t know you, never met you, never spoke to you. All I have is your site to form an opinion (which you read), just like the majority of people. You can’t please everyone but you can improve the situation…once your self-pity mode expires. You can take the easy route and walk away like you hinted on my site or you can take the harder route and regain control.

People are personally attacking you because your goals aren’t clear. Your motives aren’t clear. It’s excellent that you’re listening and I know from experience that it is hard to do but take what you’re hearing, absorb it, learn from it and regain control…or shut the doors…whatever your preference because sometimes enough is enough. This was a hell of a week. Next week is a new week…has “take control” written all over it but I like a challenge.